Friday, January 15, 2021
Eulogy for Dad
Hello, I am James Kraska Miller, the son of Wilbur R. Miller. Dr. Miller is not my natural father but my father nonetheless and the only father I have known in my life. He was my father by virtue of his dispositive role as loving husband to my mother, Marie Miller.
As husband, my dad was totally devoted to my mother’s well-being. He treated her like a princess. He was the strength and leader of their marriage and to him leadership was service, kindness, patience, and wisdom. He was caring and thoughtful – filling up my mom’s car with gas, dutifully ensuring that everything throughout the house was squared away, taking care of every detail to make her life better.
His patience and leadership were a natural part of his compassion in life as a masterful teacher, professor, dean, and vice president at University of Missouri and Auburn University. These qualities what made him a gifted instructor of golf. He won numerous awards and trophies for golf, including The Golf Channel tournaments, and he shared his expertise widely and effectively. Numerous people approached dad for lessons, including me. He generously taught people free of charge and one of his many books that he published was on how to learn golf for the adult beginner.
Dad was that rare expert who invested as much in helping other people improve their game as he did in perfecting his own. As an amateur champion in golf, his performance on the links is a metaphor for his life:
• Achieving excellence through humility and hard work;
• Rising to the top in everything as he reached down to pull others up;
• Improving everything he touched while avoiding taking credit; exercising leadership without self-aggrandizement.
o In his professional life;
o In his passion for the game of golf;
o As a devoted husband and partner to his wife;
o And as a father to me;
It is this example that resonates for me as an important life lesson of being the very best in work and play and striving in all relationships to be outstanding and competent, with patience, kindness, and empathy to help everyone around you.
I cherish the time I had with him and these life lessons. I am grateful for his dedication to my mother, whom he called his “Indian Princess.” He treated my mother like a princess and that was the greatest gift he could give a son. I know he is smiling down on us to continue to strive to live as he did, adhering to the teaching of and faith in Jesus Christ.
